What Is Divorce Coaching?
You may have heard the term “Divorce Coaching” before, but what does it actually mean? According to the American Bar Association (ABA), divorce coaching is “a flexible, goal-oriented process designed to support, motivate, and guide people going through divorce to help them make the best possible decisions for their future, based on their particular interests, needs, and concerns.”
In simpler terms, a divorce coach helps you navigate the emotional and logistical challenges of divorce, empowering you to make informed decisions that align with your needs and goals.
A divorce coach acts as a neutral thinking partner, helping clients work through the emotional, financial, and logistical complexities of the divorce process. Unlike therapy, which addresses deep emotional healing and looks backwards at past issues; or legal advice, which focuses on the legal aspects of divorce; divorce coaching is forward-focused and goal-oriented.
Some key areas where a divorce coach can help include:
- Emotional Support: Helping clients manage the stress, grief, and anger that often accompany divorce.
- Decision-Making: Guiding clients in making informed and thoughtful decisions regarding custody, finances, and lifestyle changes.
- Communication: Improving communication skills for negotiating with a spouse, co-parenting, or working with attorneys and mediators.
- Goal Setting: Helping clients clarify what they want post-divorce and creating a plan to achieve it.
- Organization: Assisting with gathering necessary documents, managing tasks, and staying organized during the divorce process.
- Conflict Resolution: Supporting clients in minimizing conflict and promoting a smoother process, often in alignment with alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation.
Because divorce is such a multifaceted experience, divorce coaches often work alongside other professionals, such as attorneys, financial planners, and therapists, to provide holistic support to their clients.
Are Divorce Coaches and Mediators the Same?
Not quite! While mediators and divorce coaches may complement each other, they play very different roles. A mediator is a neutral party who helps both sides reach agreements and create enforceable settlements. Their focus is on facilitating the resolution of disputes in a structured and impartial way.
A divorce coach, on the other hand, typically works one-on-one with their client.
They provide emotional support, guidance, and practical tools to help you stay focused, motivated, and prepared throughout the process. Divorce coaches can be especially helpful if you’re struggling with big emotions, overwhelm, or uncertainty, which can easily derail your ability to make clear decisions.
In fact, divorce coaches and mediators can work together beautifully. While the mediator facilitates the negotiation process, a divorce coach supports you behind the scenes, helping you stay calm, set boundaries, and prepare for mediation sessions. Divorce coaches often aren’t present during the mediation itself but provide valuable support before and after.
Why Consider Hiring a Divorce Coach?
At its core, divorce coaching is about giving you the tools and confidence to navigate this challenging time in a way that protects your emotional well-being, aligns with your values, and sets you up for success. It’s a personalized approach to ensure you feel supported every step of the way.
Every divorce is unique, although they have many aspects in common. In my professional practice, I encourage my clients to build healthy self-care habits to stay well during the conflict and stress of divorce. I also help my clients create a strong support team early in the divorce process. This team may include a trusted friend, family member, therapist, and depending on the client’s situation, may include other professionals like financial advisors or mediators.
Every person’s needs are different, and there’s no one-size-fits-all solution.
But with the right team in your corner, you can move through your divorce with clarity, strength, and a sense of empowerment. I encourage and support my clients to stay physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually well in the process too.
Whether you’re considering mediation, hiring an attorney, or just starting to explore your options, a divorce coach can help you manage the emotional and logistical complexities of the process—and make it to the other side with more confidence and less stress.
